Flowers arrive during the hardest week and are gone by the next one. A memory of the person, written down and printed in a book the family keeps, arrives once and stays.
Start a memory book See how it worksSympathy flowers are a genuine gesture, and families are grateful for them. They also arrive twenty at a time, need vases nobody has, wilt within the week the family is least able to deal with anything, and leave nothing behind. That is why so many obituaries now ask for something else.
What families consistently say they wish they had is different: the stories. The version of their mother that her coworkers knew. The photo from a trip in 1996 that only you have. The thing he said to you once that you never repeated to anyone. That is a gift only you can give, and no florist stocks it.
Adding a page to a memorial memory book takes about the time it takes to write a sympathy card, and the family reads it long after the service. If they are not collecting memories yet, you can start the book and send them the link — quietly, with no obligation on their part.
Three or four minutes on your phone, and nothing for the family to manage.
If the family shared a memory book link, open it. If they have not, you can start a project for them and send it along with your condolences.
Upload up to three photos and write what you remember. No account, no app, and the photos are enhanced automatically.
Each $1.25 covers one printed page. Many people give the cost of the bouquet they would have sent, which usually funds a large part of the book.
They can download a free PDF or order printed hardcovers for the household and for relatives who want one.
Not more to arrange, throw out, or write thank-you notes for.
Most of what a person was to other people never reaches their family. A written memory is the only way it gets there.
Every friend and coworker has photos the family has never seen. Yours may be the only picture of a whole part of their life.
No vase, no delivery window, no wilting arrangement to clear off the counter during the worst week of their year.
A gifted page pays directly toward a keepsake the family gets to keep, rather than something that lasts a week.
If you cannot attend the service — distance, health, timing — this is a real way to be present anyway.
The finished book is a 10-inch hardcover the family can hand to their children, which a bouquet cannot do.
You do not need to be eloquent. Specific is better than eloquent, every time.
Adding your memory is free. Gifting toward the printing is optional, and every dollar goes to the book itself.
Create the project, invite everyone, and gather photos and stories for free. You only pay if you print.
A 10-inch square matte hardcover with matte interior pages, plus shipping. Extra pages are $1.25 each.
Friends and family can chip in toward printing — each $1.25 covers one page of the finished book.
No — many obituaries now specifically ask people to. Families are frequently overwhelmed by arrangements during the week they have the least capacity to handle them, and a written memory is something they come back to for years.
You can start one and send them the link with your condolences. There is no cost to start or to collect, and no obligation for them to print anything.
Anything from $1.25, which covers one page. Some people give roughly what a sympathy bouquet would have cost, which covers a substantial part of a book.
No. You open the link, add up to three photos and your memory, and leave an email address so the family can reach you.
Not at all. Projects stay open as long as the family wants, and contributions that arrive weeks or months later are often the ones that mean the most, because they come when everyone else has moved on.
Yes. Contributions can be marked private so they are visible only to the family and invited guests rather than on a public page.
More on memorial books and how they work.
Add your memory to their book, or start one for the family and send them the link.
Start a memory book